Extremely Healthy Ways To Be Happy In Your Life

Have you every wondered what makes a person happy – why they have that “glow” about themselves?  Do you believe they have something so special in their life that you cannot have in your own?  Happiness in your life is easier to obtain than you would think.  I have a few good suggestions for extremely healthy ways to be happy in your life.

Being Grateful

This is a very important  piece of the puzzle in having the ability to live happily.  I see too many individuals who do not believe that they are blessed with just what they have.  Too many people worry about what the next person has and how they can be just like them.

A grateful attitude is crucial to happiness.  Thank your loved one for the small things like doing the dishes or cooking you dinner.  Be thankful that you have the necessities of life, love, and family.

Express your gratitude to people in your life, etc. the bagger at the grocery store for wheeling your groceries to your car, or maybe a person who allows you to go ahead of them in a long line.

Relationships

We have to accept other people for who they are and not what they have.  Each person’s situation is different, thus, it is senseless to compare ourselves with others.  You are only going to be happy with the choices that you make for yourself and not what someone else wants or does.

When you really try and understand another person you will probably see a totally different point of view from yours.  In many cases, this allows you to better understand their side of the story.

Also, it is very important to express your feelings, affections, friendship and passion to people around you and most of the time they will reciprocate those same feelings.  Also, let go of all resentments.

Stressful News

This is one that is so prevalent in today’s society and it is all around us.  This kind of news can be good or it can be bad.  But, we have to learn how to put it into perspective.  There are many things in life that we cannot control – cuts in Medicare, downsizing our position at work, our vehicle breaking down, etc.

The whole nation is worried about the future of the economy and our retirement.  So many college graduates are saddled with enormous student loan debt.  Many individuals are paying on 30-year mortgages at high interest rates and others are paying on 5-year loans on vehicles.

Another scary side of the stressful news is that of the violence going on all over the world.  Also, the immigration issues that we as individuals have no control over.  Furthermore, the terrorist attacks of late happening all over the world.

We have to sort out what issues we as individuals have control over and concentrate on those things.  If we try to conquer the world, we are only asking for severely high blood pressure levels and risks of heart attacks.

Connect Religiously

This is so crucial in helping with feelings of helplessness, loneliness, and uncertainty.  This is a great outlet and coming together of like-minded people that you can talk to and spend time with.

Involvement in a religious group can include singing, sacraments, chanting, prayer, and meditation to foster inner peace.  Some religious organizations put aside a day of the week for a night out bowling or getting together for a potluck dinner, or even a group picnic.

This type of environment can help build new friendships, which could turn out to be lifetime relationships.

Time Management

This is something that a lot of people have trouble with.  In order to get anything accomplished, you have to manage your time wisely.

Making lists of rules that involve scheduling, setting goals, planning, and creating lists of things to do are all necessary in order to prioritize and get things done.   These core skills need to be developed in order to be efficient with your time management.

Once core skills are developed then the fine tuning of those points of each basic core will give you the skills that can give you the extra reserve to achieve the results you desire.

Laugh Everyday

This is very important.  You know the old saying, “Laughter is the best medicine.”  This is really true.  Laughter can release the tendons and muscles in the jaw and face which may become tense and painful.

Just listening to someone tell a joke or a funny story can make you laugh.  Also, one thing I have learned to do is laugh at myself.  When you can laugh at yourself you tend to allow yourself some leeway.  This is not near as stressful as being so hard on yourself.

If you can make fun of yourself when you do something stupid, this is good for the heart and soul.

Working Hard

For many individuals, working hard brings great satisfaction.  It gives you a feeling of self-worth.  You feel like you belong or fit somewhere in this world we live in.

The feeling of accomplishment is empowering and makes you want to work more.  For many, accomplishments give us a sense of value.

Additionally, we feel worthy when we work on things that are important to us.

Forever Learning

This is one of my most favorite things to do.  For most people, it is a positive adventure.  The annals of medicine say that lifelong learning can be attributed to preventing Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, etc.

Also, learning just one thing a day exercises the brain and mind.  Constantly exercising the brain allows the neurons and electrical impulses to stretch and move.

This can challenge the brain to expand and broaden, thus allowing us to explore new opportunities.

In addition, I have found that completing educational goals can also boost one’s sense of accomplishment and feelings of worthiness.

Staying Active

Most people have some kind of daily activity or exercise routine.  This can be a 15-minute run on the treadmill or a 15-minute walk around the neighborhood.

There is never a need to go to a gym.  You can rake leaves, sweep the driveway, or vacuum the house.  You can even take the dog for a walk.  This is all considered legitimate exercise.

Staying active flexes the muscles and tendons.  It also gets the heart pumping and the blood flowing throughout the body.  This is excellent for getting the juices going and flushing our body of toxins.

Conclusion

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, there are several ways that we can be happy and content in our lives without having to spend money or cause risks to our health.

Performing several of these exercises a day can greatly increase our feelings of well-being.  We will also feel a sense of accomplishment and purpose at the end of the day.

Changing your mindset to align with the tips noted above can really help you identify any weak areas in your life that you may feel you need to change and also enhance other areas of your life in the meantime.

 

Is A Woman’s Career A Relationship Deal Breaker?

Is A Woman's Career A Relationship Deal Breaker?Today, women out perform and out earn their male counterparts in many careers.  But, when it comes to a woman’s personal life, Is a woman’s career a relationship deal breaker?

As women evolve, some men see their female counterparts as reliable and capable equals.

But, can the same be said with regard to a woman’s career and her personal relationship choices?   

There are too many variables on this subject to put into a single blog post.  Today’s post focuses on those who have completed college and are in, or just starting out in, a lucrative career.

This target population may, or may not, have the following:

  • A family (husband, wife, children)
  • A significant amount of debt (credit cards)
  • A permanent residence (home purchase)
  • An expensive hobby (gambling)

Immediately I see difficulty with the ability to determine (for someone else) whether a woman’s lucrative career could become an issue in her future relationship choices.

This topic is extremely personal and should be determined on a one-on-one basis.

Matters of Sustenance (Needs)

It should start with where you are in your life and what your basic needs will be into the future.  If a woman is thriving in her career, her needs will be taken care of automatically.  This makes it unnecessary for a man to provide her sustenance.

Of course, there are those who do try to take advantage of the situation.  But, those who are genuine and enter into the relationship for all the right reasons, will discuss the financial ramifications and its affects.

In addition, a discussion should be undertaken regarding the expectations from either party involved in the relationship.

Getting things out in the open in the beginning regarding who will buy food, utilities, and entertainment will dispel any misunderstandings in the future.

Matters of Materialism (Tangibles)

Not everyone believes a woman should pay for all the materialistic items in a relationship if she makes more money than the man.  But, I do believe if a woman makes a comfortable living that she should pay for her materialistic needs.

This is also a difficult issue to sort out because it is purely based on personal preference and expectations that should be expressed at the beginning of the relationship.

As we all know, there are some men who inherently wish to “lavish” women with such things as jewelry, clothes, etc., but these men are few and far between.

You might ask – if a woman is materialistic resulting from her lucrative career – Is a woman’s career a relationship deal breaker?

Matters of the Heart (Love)

Of course this does not equate to the psychological needs of a male-female relationship or the enjoyment of each other for which God created us.

Whether male or female, we all enjoy the friendship and companionship of the opposite sex.

Love is a feeling that is unique to each person and cannot be explained in exactly the same way by any two people.  There is no measure of one’s love for another and “true love” cannot be bought.

Therefore, no matter how much money a woman makes, she could never buy “true” eternal love.  The same goes for men.

Although there are many who have mistaken “money for love,” this is just a fleeting fantasy that usually ends badly.  For centuries, men and women have both mistaken money for love.

Matters of Emotion (Feelings)

It has been said that women are so much more emotional than men – but, I tend to believe that men and women are both emotional.  The only difference is that women show it outwardly and men internalize them.

Just because a woman might make more money than her partner does not mean that she feels any less love for her partner and vice versa.  Now, there are those who believe that love can be bought, but this is usually 99% false.

True feelings and intentions usually cannot stay hidden for extended periods of time.  It just becomes too much work and too hard to continue covering up false intentions and false expectations.

Matters of the Soul (Spirit)

Men have just as much spirit as women do regardless of how much money either one makes.  Spirit comes from within and is fostered by both good and bad things.

Negativism and condemnation can squash a spirit like stepping on an ant while walking through the park.

Spirit can also be boosted.  Our spirit is usually built on the ideals and philosophies that we are exposed to as we are growing into adults.

We begin to form certain beliefs and customs in our life that we believe are for the good and that will make us happy.

Sometimes, that spirit is contagious.  Others cannot help but see that we have a way of spreading happiness.

We may have a unique way of making a person feel good about something that they said or did.  This builds confidence and a sense of self worth.

So, this begs the question – does a woman brings more soul to a relationship if she has a lucrative career, or Is a woman’s career a relationship deal breaker?

Matters of the Mind (Power)

Throughout time, men and women have fought for power among the sexes and there is nothing stopping it today.  But, there are people in the world who will exploit a person.

Brainwashing a person into believing that they would be a better person if they would share their excesses (money, etc.) is one way of exploiting a person who has money or physical possessions worth any money.

Matters of the mind usually take quite a bit of time to work, and this can be for good or bad reasons.  But, when it comes to women and them having money, this is the #1 thing that most people exploit others for.

Matters of the Body (Physical)

Another form of exploitation is through physical power and strength over another individual.  Physical power over another is not a good thing in any way as far as I am concerned.

The physical trauma that a woman endures from anyone who is able to overcome her physically can be very debilitating and traumatic.

This is one of the worst things that can happen to a woman because we are (usually) the weaker sex and cannot defend ourselves.

Matters of Perceived Power

There is also “perceived power” that a person places over another whether male or female.

If the female makes the larger portion of the relationship income, she may be perceived to have more power.  This “perceived power” is taught from the early beginnings of society.

Even though it varies from generation to generation, there are still conflicting views.

This is a very divided subject as both men and women chose to agree to disagree.  This includes issues regarding money and the value it ranks each at in the relationship.  But, this is also an individual choice.

Matters of the Bible (Spiritual)

Spiritual teachings vary in the Bible and many different interpretations exist in today’s society.  But, there are still conflicting views.

Translations from the teachings of the Bible are quite different and can go in many different directions (which is why I will only touch lightly on this subject).

But, the underlying current still flows through (spiritually) the Bible that women (no matter their financial position) are inferior to man in any relationship.

This, too, should be based on a solid understanding of what is expected and what it optional going into the relationship.

This begs the question as to whether a lucrative career should afford a woman more power in a relationship – or Is a woman’s career a relationship deal breaker?

 

What Does Your Desk Say About Your Personality?

What your desk says about your personalityIf at home or at the office, we all work from a desk of some kind.  While there are many different sizes and shapes of desks, what does your desk say about your personality?   Do you have a messy desk or do you have a tidy desk?

This article is about what a messy desk and a tidy desk could mean about your personality.   When a person looks at your desk, there are one of two things a person will immediately notice about your desk and your personality:

  • Neat Desk
  • Messy Desk
 What it Means if Your Desk is Neat

I have always heard that a neat desk is a sign of an organized  individual.  But, it could mean that currently there is no work going on, or that the person using the desk has completed their work for the day.

Kathleen Vohs, Ph.D, scientist and professor from the University of Minnesota, gathered together approximately 48 participants and performed a study regarding neat and messy desks.  She found that 34 percent of participants with a clean desk had a greater likelihood of making healthier food choices.

Daniel J. Levitin, cognitive psychologist, wrote the book The Organized Mind.  In his book, he explores how we organize our minds and lives in the  age of social media.  Levitin indicates that many of us experience mental benefits from performing organizational tasks.

He goes on to say that the act of “organizing” or “reorganizing” our desks could mean that we are stressed.  Neurologically, this activity helps us to explore new connections to the things that clutter our minds and geographical spaces.

He goes on to say that the mind-wandering mode allows us to re-categorize the relationship of those objects to one another, which may spark creativity.  Furthermore, just the act or organizing our spaces has the power to make us more productive.

What it Means if Your Desk is Messy

As we have seen, there are pros and cons of both a tidy and a messy desk.  If your desk tends to be messier than tidy, this could be a sign of disorganization.  But, a new research study from the University of Minnesota has found an unlikely result – that messiness encourages creativity.

It was also found that the environment can influence whether we keep a tidy or messy desk.  Keeping a messy area could mean more creativity.  Persons who work in cluttered spaces tend to come up with better solutions and can be extremely creative individuals.

Neuro-scientific research has recently found that creative minded individuals have an area in the brain that tends to foster the imagination.  Thus, resulting in the fact that messiness could encourage creativity.  I am a neat desk person, but I am not creative.  So, it would seem that the results of this research could have some validity to it.

Do You Have What It Takes To Work From Home?

Do You Have What It Takes To Work From Home?More of us are working from home than ever before.  Some of us commute between travel and home to do business.  But, do you have what it takes to work from home?

While there are many different types of businesses operating from home offices, there are a few things that do not change when working from home.  This article explains the mindset behind operating a successful home office business.

While this article is not all inclusive, it does cover what I believe are the most important inherent traits necessary to successfully operate a home office.  I hope this information will help you to answer the question do you have what it takes to work from home? 

The traits mandatory for successfully working from home include, but are not limited to:

  • Discipline
  • Boundaries
  • Time management
Do You Have the Discipline to Work From Home?

This is probably the most important value when working from home.  A lot of people have the belief that working from home is easy.  But, the majority of these beliefs come from false ideologies and dreamy ideas about how good it would be to be your own boss or how great it would be to work off a time clock.

Wow, speaking from experience, being your own boss and working off a time clock are the most misconstrued facts about working from home.

Being your own boss is a lot harder than you think.  This is where the discipline comes in.  You absolutely have to know what is expected of you and how you are going to deliver that expectation.  In essence, you literally have to think from a supervisor’s standpoint and an employee point of view – all at the same time.

Knowing the quality of your work and how long it takes you to accomplish certain client requests is imperative in gaining the confidence of future business clients.

Many businesses fail because a person will overextend themselves with commitment and then for some reason or the other, are not able to follow through on that commitment.  This can be devastating to your business.  You will quickly lose clients if you are not accountable.

At times, discipline may require putting off going to the movies for the sake of completing a client request.  This is very real and can conflict with your personal life if you do not plan accordingly.  This is where many people fail, but with practice and perseverance, you can overcome this with practice.

Can You Set Boundaries For Your Home Office?

This is both a physical and a mental element of having a successful home office.

The physical boundaries include the ability to separate or close off your home office from any other area of your home.  Do you have doors that you can shut and a specific area that you can go to, such as a desk, to complete your work from home?

If you do not have doors to your home office, then you will need some type of separation to indicate that your office is a separate area of the home that is to only be used for your working area.

You could also use a privacy screen or a cubicle that can be purchased at any home goods store.  I would strongly suggest that your work area have the ability to be completely closed off from the rest of the house.  This helps you to mentally transfer your thoughts from home to office when you walk into your home office.

Boundaries should also be set with family members, especially if you have children.  Children should be schooled with regard to your working hours and when, and for what reason, they are allowed to interrupt you while you are working.

Of course, aside from an emergency, there should be criteria for the children to follow when they are in need of something.  Naturally, depending on their age, children should always be in the company of a grownup if you are working.

Everyone’s situation is different, so the hard and fast rules are going to differ on the interruptions at home.  But, I cannot stress enough that if you do not set boundaries regarding your work time and home time, you will end up not having enough hours in the day to complete your work.

Do You Have Time Management Skills?

This was mentioned earlier in this post, but I cannot stress enough the need for time management when working from home.  There are so many potential interruptions and family issues that can interrupt you if you do not carefully manage your time.

I am a firm believer in always getting things completed before the deadline.  I find that working on the plan for completing a project before actually starting the project is half the battle.

You have to think ahead about what is involved in the project and what tools you are going to need to complete the project.

Also, when putting together your time management plan you need to allot yourself a few extra hours of buffer time in case something unexpected happens.

There are still things that may interrupt your work from home that are completely out of your control.  This could be a medical issue, a child has been hurt, a family member has died, etc.  These are all things that we have no control over.

In summary, if you possess discipline, can set boundaries in your home environment, and have good time management skills, you will be able to answer the question “do you have what it takes to work from home?” with the answer “Yes.”

 

Does Your Home Office Rock?

Does your home office "rock"?Working from home is clearly not for everyone, or we would all be doing it.  But, for those of us who do work from home, does your home office rock?

In this article, I explain a few things to keep in mind when asking yourself does your home office rock?

This article is not all inclusive regarding things to keep in mind when creating your ideal home office, but it should get you started thinking in the right direction.   The first three items of utmost consideration should include:

  • Purpose (involves the scope of work to be done in the home office).
  • Size (involves the square footage necessary for the work area).
  • Location (involves the area of the home, i.e. garage, spare bedroom, etc.)
Purpose of Your Home Office

The purpose of your home office is the heart of your livelihood.  This is a place where you will be spending a considerable amount of time, so you want it to be as comfortable and efficient as possible.

At this point, a lot of you would probably say, “well, the purpose of my home office is to work, right?”  Well, yes, but what I mean is the complete scope of what you will do on a daily basis.

Each profession, trade, or hustle has its own accommodations that need to be incorporated into the creation of your home office.  Otherwise, you may find that your home office is not sufficient and/or efficient.

For example, an insurance salesman would need an area to do paperwork and greet customers.

Also, filing cabinet space for storing insurance documents and medical information is mandatory by law.  In addition, bookcases for trade books and other career literature is a comfortable addition.

Furthermore, a desk, computer and printer are necessary and a storage cabinet for office supplies would help with organization and general office appearance.  Office chairs are also a necessity.

Size of Your Home Office

This element of consideration is going to depend a lot on the thoughts and ideas you established in determining the purpose of your office.

This portion of your office is again dependent on the type of business or side hustle you may be engaged in.  Also, to some extent, this is a personal consideration.  Each person is different.  Some people need larger work areas than others to feel productive.

Others seem to work better in a very minimal area.  Again, as long as you have everything you need to do the job, the square footage will be decided on what you determine is necessary for an environment that you can thrive in.

Even the smallest of houses these days are capable of having home office areas included in them.  With so many trends on organizing, saving space and minimalizing spaces in homes, there will be a solution for just about everyone.

With the advent of the “cloud”, trends in paperless offices are becoming more common.  Also, cell phones are being used to do business much more than land lines because of the mobility required with new technology and internet trends for businesses.

Location of Your Home Office

After you have determined the purpose and area needed for your home office business, the location of your office will become the last major consideration for your new business.

What you will be doing in your home office and the space necessary to do it in will give you the answer to where you should create your office space.

Most often you will be able to locate an adaptable area within your home that will fit both your business and your physical needs for your “rockin” home office.

While there are a great many other things to consider when setting up a home office business, the issues noted above are just a couple of the very first questions that you need to ask yourself.

Like I said before, the elements listed above are just the tip of the iceberg regarding questions that you need to answer before you begin planning to work from home.

Plans for Future Blog Posts on Your “Rockin” Home Office

I have had the experience of having a home office for upwards of 25 years now and I truly enjoy my work area.  I have quite a bit of experience with working in a home office and about planning the “rockin” work area.

In future posts, I plan to go into greater detail about my experiences with working in a home office.  There is a lot of information to consider in making it work for you and I would love to share that with you.

So, I look forward to providing you with this information in future blog posts.  I may even get into some of the mentality that it takes to work from home.

Regardless of what you plan to do “from home,” there is always a way to work things out to your advantage.  I hope to give you some ideas and methods you may not have otherwise thought about.

Until we meet again!!!!

 

Things To Consider When Using Smartphone Mobile Apps

mobile apps, mobile phoneWhen I began using a smartphone, I didn’t understand what mobile apps were, let alone the dangers that some of these social media apps could cause.  This article will help you to understand some things to consider when using smartphone mobile apps.

Today, we depend on our smartphones like we do our wallets and/or purses.  They have become so ingrained in our lives, some of us just cannot imagine being without them.

Smartphone mobile apps have made it very easy to get just about anything we want.

We can also get it just about anytime we want – a ride, a pizza, etc.

On the other hand, many of us do not think about the risks of using some of these mobile apps.  We seem to be more caught up in the mindset of convenience and self-gratification.  Here are some things to consider when using smartphone mobile apps:

Trusting Complete Strangers

This is the one that troubles me the most.  These apps are innovative and trendy along with having the ability to solve almost any problem in a relatively short amount of time.  But, do we know who we are contacting – most likely not.

I know when I was growing up, just talking to strangers was not aloud.  My parents were very conscious about providing me with the skills to avoid danger and this was one of them.

There is a lot of news and publicity out now about the different ways you can be deceived when dealing with people and things online.  The reporting of social media crimes is definitely helping to make us more aware of the criminals and how they are able to trick us into buying into whatever they are doing.

Research Background Checks

This one is extremely important in that we really do not know who we are dealing with when we have not met or talked with a potential person or business face to face.  This is exactly what the criminals count on – and that is the fact that you are going to trust the information that they are putting out there without checking sources.

Many businesses only perform the very minimum of background checks.  This just tells them that on the surface they seem like a person you would want to do business with.

But, my suggestion is that you take the background check one step further.  Pay a little bit of money to find out anything and everything you can about the person or business.

In doing so, you are also buying piece of mind and safety.  Also, you could potentially save yourself from losing money if you enter into business with someone who is not on the up-and-up.  This is the big one today because it seems some people try to “get rich quick” any way they can.

Read Over User Reviews

I have found this to be something I just automatically do when I am considering the use of a new smartphone mobile app.  I like to see how many reviews an app has received and the quality of those reviews.

There have been times when I have read reviews and find that someone has responded with only a couple of words – like “awful” or “don’t waste your time,” etc.  This kind of short review is very telling.   This signals that the person is not happy with their experience and wanted to leave a review, but could only muster up a couple of words.

Some of the more useful reviews will come as a paragraph or so.  The person who leaves this type of review finds the app so useful that they have no problem explaining all of the things that they found were helpful to them.

The more information in a review, the better off you will be.  A genuine review is explanatory and will usually describe how some of the features of the app actually worked for the user.

This is very beneficial because it reveals more information about the app and better assists you in formulating a decision regarding the usability of it for your needs.

Let Someone Know Where You Are

This is extremely important no matter who you are.  If you are 13, or if you are 67 years of age, safety and danger apply to everyone.  Danger does not discriminate.  The act of meeting someone that you have never met before should put anyone on alert.

If anything is going to go wrong, this is when and where it will go wrong.  This is when the deceitful perpetrator has you in their physical custody and will do with you what they want to.

I was watching TV the other evening and a snippet came over the air about starting up what some call “internet meetups.”  These are actually a physical location in your town or city where there is undercover security or policemen who actually man these areas and watch for one-on-one engagements and/or transactions with others.

Personally, I believe this is an awesome idea.  I do realize that it takes manpower to do this, but maybe it could be done in areas where the “security officers” or “policemen” are already surveilling.  If you are doing business on the up-and-up, then you won’t mind transacting in front of these officers – at least for safety sake.

Always Guard Your Smartphone Data

I found a little tidbit of information that I did not realize about photos.  According to K2 Intelligence, using the same photograph on social media (Facebook, LinkedIn, etc.) and on mobile apps (such as a photo retouch app, etc.) allows a stranger to do a reverse-image search that will reveal your real name and workplace.

Additionally, it is always good to place private things, or photos that you want to forward selectively to others, in the “cloud.”  There are so many different cloud apps out there, but just make sure you can “double authenticate” your account.

This means that you are using twice the security instead of a single password or passcode.  This could be in the form of either a fingerprint and a password, or a fingerprint and a pin number, etc.  You get the idea, right?

Always research any software application that you are going to put sensitive or confidential information in because it is just that – sensitive (private).  You definitely would not want information that you would like to share with only one person to be seen all over social media so everyone can see it.

Limit Non Face-To-Face Conversation on Smartphones

With this one, it is crucial that you reveal only the most minimal of information.  Thus, be careful how much you say and exactly what you reveal.  The more you are going to talk, the more you are going to reveal.  This is just human nature.

For example, a Uber driver could overhear you talking to someone about where you are going and when you will be back.  Or, you may talk to someone in setting up a reservation in the Uber driver’s earshot, thus allowing them to overhear you reciting personal information.

In addition, a delivery person could overhear you on the phone if you answer the door with your smartphone in your hand.  Now, that delivery person is within earshot of any personal information you may recite while the delivery is made.  For example, you could be speaking to someone about you being alone until your roommate comes back from vacation in a  week, etc.

Utilize Gut Instinct and Intuition

Some of us have one or the other of these, and some of us have none of these.  That’s just our chemical makeup and why we are not all alike.  Thank goodness!!

Anyway, as we go through new experiences in life, we formulate good, bad, or indifferent feelings about certain things that the next person may feel.  This is called our “gut instinct” or “intuition.”

For the sake of brevity, they are very similar, but they are different.  I have heard that these traits can be inherited or they cannot be inherited – it’s just a hit or miss.

I was lucky enough to inherit the “intuition,” but did not realize it until I was in my 20’s.  Personally, I perceive this as a “sixth sense.”  It almost feels magical and mysterious in some ways.

It comes over me like a voice speaking to me in my head.  It will say to me such things as “pay attention to that guy’s eyes, he’s lying to you because he is not looking directly at you.”

Or, it could come in the wave of a feeling of uneasiness.  This is a feeling that, given a certain situation, the facts just don’t make sense, or the circumstances just don’t add up.

Whatever it may be, just pay attention to what your gut or your “little voice” is saying to you.  Once you start paying attention to it, you will be able to further develop it and fine tune it.  It does get better with practice.

Through the years, I have done this and it has improved my ability to predict an appropriate reaction or outcome in many cases.  So, let’s try to be more careful and think about the things to consider when using smartphone mobile apps.

 

 

 

What To Do If You Are Having a Bad Day

We all have a bad day every now and then.  Do you find yourself wondering if anything will go right before the end of your day.  I have experienced this on many occasions and have some ideas for you regarding what to do if you are having a bad day. 

 

Take Time Out to Regroup

When things continue to go wrong during the day, most of the time it is coincidental.  Some of us believe all different kinds of things, like maybe someone is trying to sabotage our success.  I used to believe that coworkers were silently trying to create problems for me when in actuality there was none of this going on at all.

If you are at work, and time allows, try to sit back in a quiet area and think about why things are happening the way they are.  Pick apart the processes you are using to complete tasks and try to identify  any areas where you might be cutting corners.  It is possible that you may be running along on “auto-pilot” and do not realize that you may have left out a step.

When attempting to complete projects small or large, at home or at work, always be mindful of completing them with your best quality work.  No project or task is worth starting and putting the time into if you are not going to produce good quality project results.  Bad quality or no quality at all is a total waste of your time.

Stay Positive and Move Forward

Sometimes, we sabotage ourselves with negative thoughts about our ability to perform well at work or in social situations.  These negative thoughts are usually self-manifested and are strong emotions that could potentially affect our confidence and create uncertainties.

Human nature craves challenges.  This is the method by which we learn our strengths and weaknesses.  Challenges keep life interesting and exciting.  But, sometimes we hold back for fear of failure and this can stagnate our ability and energy to move forward and try again.

Once we take that step into the unknown and are successful with it, we begin to generate positive thinking and motivation to take us to the next level.  Positivity and confidence allow us to move forward.  This generates a sense of well-being and purpose.

Give Yourself a Treat at the End of the Day

This is my favorite part of having a ‘bad day’.  Yes, I do have a favorite thing about bad days and that is to treat myself.  Now, I know what you may be thinking, “Why would I want to treat myself after bad things have happened all day?”  Well, there is a lesson here, and I learned this by experiencing it.

Today’s society is a rat race and a fast-paced world.  Too many of us do not take time out to enjoy the small things in life because we are so busy with jobs, family, taking care of our home, childcare, etc.  Not to say that these things are not small things and that we shouldn’t pay attention to them.  What I’m talking about is that once in a while craving for an ice cream cone, or a long bubble bath with candles all around the room.

Also, if your budget allows, you could treat yourself with that “wished for” purse or pair of shoes.  I am guilty of this one, but I use it sparingly because I am not a materialistic person.  In addition, I do not need the additional “stuff” that ultimately collects when you buy material things.  Anyway, you get the picture, huh?

Learn the Lessons From Your Bad Days

It may sound confusing to say, but there are good things about having bad days.  Yes, I know what you are thinking and I really don’t wish to have bad days in my life.  But, the fact is that we are all going to have bad days in our life and we need to pay attention to the lessons that these ‘bad days’ can teach us.

For one, we identify a possible weakness in the process of our daily life.  Once that weakness is identified, we have the opportunity to make improvements to that weakness.  After some practice, it is no longer a weakness.  ‘Bad days’ are not always our fault – a coworker could have embarrassed us, a conversation could have gone wrong, or we could have spent too much money on that dip for the kid’s birthday party (if you live on a budget, which you should be anyway).

Even though these ‘bad day’ occurrences are sometimes very trivial or small, there are times that ‘bad day’ experiences can be huge or monumental, thus creating feelings of “uneasy emotions.”  So, at the end of the day, I personally like to treat myself to a glass of wine when I have had a ‘bad day.’

I have found that anything that relaxes you and eases your tensions from the day is an excellent treat not only for the mind, but also our bodies.  Treating ourselves with methods of relaxation can help our body rejuvenate and unwind in preparation for the next day.  Healthy living is a major treat in and of itself.

assertive mother elephant

How To Be Assertive Without Saying a Word

Posted on July 14, 2017 by Christine Wilcox
assertive mother elephantThere are many ways to express assertiveness. How to be assertive without saying a word is one of those ways.

Many of us struggle with the most efficient and productive way to be assertive.

All of us experience assertiveness on  a daily basis through our job, at home, or with friends and family.  We also interpret assertiveness in different ways, which is why we sometimes perceive assertiveness negatively.  This happens when we are not expressing our assertiveness in a productive and well thought out manner. In this post, I discuss positive ways to be assertive without saying a word.

How To Be Assertive Making Eye Contact

Making eye contact with someone is imperative if you are going to get his or her attention.  Eye contact with another person means you are serious and that you are not lying.  Dead on eye contact tells the other person that you are serious – whether good or bad.

Eye contact is a sign of truthfulness and resolve.  If the person does not look away and steadily stares you right in the eyes for a lengthy period of time, they are serious and mean what they are saying.

Looking someone in the eye is a sign of openness and self-assurance.  In addition, this is a technique law enforcement uses to indicate whether someone is being truthful or not.

How To Be Assertive With Body Movements

When  you speak to someone face to face, there are body movements that really exhibit hidden messages.  These body movements can be discrete, such as the way they are standing or even the tilt of their head.  This is considered hidden communication.

Tilting one’s head to the side most often means that they are listening and interested in what the other person is saying.  Holding one’s arm down to the side and slightly to the back usually means that you are open to their discussion and that you have nothing to hide.

Shaking one’s leg up and down while sitting in a chair could mean they are bored with you or the conversation.  Another one that really “irks” me is when someone keeps looking at their watch while you are eating or talking to them.

How To Have An Assertive Posture

When you are sitting or standing, exhibit an open posture to convey confidence and cooperation.  If you are sitting, place your arms by the sides of the chair and plant your feet firmly on the ground.  Also, sit up straight.  In addition, when sitting at a public dining table, do not rest your head in your hands with your elbows on the table.

This is very disrespectful and exhibits laziness and an unprofessional appearance.  Furthermore, some may interpret this to mean that you are not interested in being where you are.  Additionally, women should always sit in a chair with their legs completely closed and a hand on the front bottom of the skirt to ensure that their body is properly clothed for the occasion.

Being Assertive and Personal Space

Personal space is that area in close proximity to the body, face, shoulders, hips, etc.  This could also mean your fenced backyard or even the boundary inside your home.  Not everyone defines their personal space the same.  It is the space at which you begin to feel very uncomfortable with something or someone around or near you.

This could be someone hollering something close to your ear.  Even just someone standing right behind you, who may have come up a little too close not realizing they were right on your neck.  Your personal space could also mean someone sitting too close to you on a city bus.

In addition, it could also mean a neighbor who is a busy body and cannot mind his or her own business.  In other words, they always seem to know what is going on in your household before you know it.

Be Assertive and Say “No”

I am guilty of this one. But, you should always be careful who you say “no” to.  First, I believe it is necessary to set boundaries with each and every person that you have any day-to-day relationship with.  Caution here – as you should be careful who you say “no” to.

Friends and family, as well as some employers, will take advantage of you if you allow them to.  Many people think that standing up for yourself could end up costing you your job, friendships, or even family member relationships.  This is why it is so important that you are being assertive without them feeling threatened.

This is not always the case though, as it has shown that many people will respect you for taking up for yourself.

If you feel like you may be saying “yes” too much and are feeling overwhelmed, I suggest keeping a log of your positive and negative experiences to assist you in setting your own limits.

Lastly, think back on a previous instance and ask yourself, “How did that go when I said ‘no” to Mr. So and so,” and then ask yourself if there is anything you would do different the next time.

 

 

 

 

How To Get A Good Night’s Sleep

How To Get A Good Night’s Sleep

Published By Christine Wilcox  –  July 7, 2017

There are many benefits of getting a good night’s sleep.  But, getting a good night’s sleep is difficult for some of us.  In this article, I discuss how to get a good night’s sleep.

Waking up and not feeling good the next morning is the worst feeling for starting your day.

With a good night’s sleep, you wake rested, relaxed, revitalized, and energetic.  In addition, your concentration  is increased and you achieve more during the day.  Furthermore, sleep helps your tissues grow and regenerate.

A good night’s sleep can help to improve your overall appearance, your skin will look clearer, and you will not see dark circles under your eyes.  When you sleep well, you are less likely to have an accident, suffer from depression, or experience aches and pains.

In this article, I discuss how to get a good night’s sleep:

Sleep Patterns And Getting A Good Night’s Sleep

As we all know, each person has a different sleep pattern – meaning that no one’s sleep pattern is identical to another one’s sleep pattern.  Many people can drift off to sleep easily where others may spend minutes to hours before finally falling asleep.

Like myself, some people are nocturnal individuals, but others are daytime individuals.  I am most productive during the nighttime hours.  I began to notice this about myself while in grade school.  I was not sleepy when everyone else in the family was sleepy.

If you pay attention to your sleep habits, you can begin to identify the positive patterns that make you most productive during the day.  One way to identify your sleep habits is to keep a sleep journal.  After several weeks of journaling your sleep habits, you can then identify your problem habits.

Your Sleep Zone And A Good Night’s Sleep

Your sleep zone is the area in your home in which you choose to go to bed every night.  There are several things you can do in this area that will further your ability to get a good night’s sleep.

First, the lighting in your ‘sleep zone’ should be none.  A completely dark area in your sleep zone is mandatory in order to achieve a good night’s sleep.

Second, the temperature in your sleep zone should be just a few degrees cooler than the rest of your home.  This is because your body temperature rises just a bit once you are asleep.

Third, all sounds should be minimal to none once you go to bed.  These small changes will trigger your body to send you to sleep.  Television should be avoided in the bedroom because this is not a sleep trigger and could disrupt your Circadian Rhythm.

Fourth, reading requires lighting and should also be avoided.  Although, I do know several people, including myself, who say that reading causes them to become sleepy.  You should determine this pattern individually.

Lastly, your bed, mattress, and pillows should be comfortable, clean, and supportive to achieve a good sleeping position.  If your bedding is not comfortable and relaxing you could wake up with sore bones and muscles.

Winding Down And A Good Night’s Sleep

Winding down from your day is essential to allow your body to begin relaxing and preparing for your sleep triggers to kick in.

Setting a regular bedtime is one way to assure that your body is setting itself up for getting a good night’s sleep.  Everyone should acquire this habit because it really makes a difference in how you think, feel, and perform the next day.

Your body will begin to wind itself down slowly before your bedtime in preparation for sleep.  Also, there are several relaxation techniques to assist your body in preparing you for sleep.

One way to relax is to listen to calming music before bedtime.  Another way to wind down is to have a soothing drink before going to bed.  I like to have a cup of chamomile tea, which mildly sedates me.

Another way to wind down is to draw a warm bath before bedtime.  This will help your body train itself to trigger your sleep patterns.  The more times you follow your personal winding down routine, the quicker you will establish your evening sleeping ritual.

Getting sufficient and good-quality sleep affects your mood, concentration, memory, and general health.  It also helps our body’s to heal, which is a very important benefit for good health.

 

 

 

Tips For Better Communication

We all know that good communication in the workplace and among family and friends can be difficult at times.  By utilizing some tips for better communication, we can assure that we are heard and understood.

Problems occur when we are in a hurry to tell someone something and, in haste, we leave out an important word or words.

Following these top tips for better communication will help alleviate confusion, misunderstanding and stress in ways that will improve communication with others.

The majority of the time this is because not everyone hears or interprets information in the same manner.  The exact word repeated to 10 different individuals would not return the exact same definition.  I note several tips for better communication:

Talk Face to Face For Better Communication

This is really a “no-brainer.”  Talking face-to-face is upfront and personal.  You see the other person’s facial expressions and body language.  You can easily hear the other person speaking because of their close proximity.

Reading lips is another way to communicate.  Most of us utilize both methods to understand and comprehend what the other person is saying.  On the chance that we do not hear every word, we can use lip reading to fill in the blanks.

If you think about it, this method of communication is something we start learning from the time we begin to recognize our parents faces.  Some of us read lips better than others, but all of us can read lips to some extent.

Listen to What is Said When Communicating

This is also a “no-brainer.”  In today’s society, everyone is multitasking.  This has its pros and cons.  When we multitask, we are actually interrupting our self to work on something else.  This becomes distracting if you have too many things going on at the same time.

This is called multitasking and we all do this to some extent every day.  Our attention span is stressed to the limit and we cut corners to get things done.  Communication is a major factor in every aspect of our lives and we need to pay attention when someone has something they would like to say to us.

We want people to hear us and have the opportunity to speak.  We do not have to agree with everything we hear, but we should show others respect and listen to what they have to say.  To receive respect you have to give respect.  You should hear a person out even if you do not believe what they are telling you.

Repeat what you say if you are not sure that someone heard you.  If they do not understood what you said, ask them to explain it with further elaboration.  Better communication is crucial in all types of relationships.

Try Resolving Problems

Resolving problems in the privacy of your home or in the workplace is very difficult especially if one person is working against the majority.  It is inevitable that we will face problems in our lives at work, at home, or with family members.  This is human nature because we are all different people and have different opinions.  However, there are ways in which we can go about resolving these problems.

The result is not going to please everyone, but with compromise everyone gets an advantage in the end.  This takes talking things out either individually or in a group, depending on the situation.  It is imperative that you listen to everyone’s views involved in any conflict.

Furthermore, assisting in the resolution of a conflict brings some satisfaction.  This brings unity to the conflict and among the individuals involved.  When everyone feels they had a part in resolving a conflict then we have achieved our goal.

Criticize Contructively

This one can be tricky.  We have all experienced criticism in our lives.  If not, I would certainly like to meet you.  Do you feel bad when criticized?  Do you feel beat down and shamed?  This is not the way to express dissatisfaction with someone or with something they may have done.

I think about it this way – the word “constructive” means the act of building.  Then I would say, “criticize by building that person up and not down.”  Give them some direction and initiative to try again.  Of course, let them know what went wrong and explain to them how they can avoid this in the future.

Also, it is important to understand their reasoning for why things happened the way they did.  This will give you an idea of how to address the problem and make the changes necessary for the future.  Discussing things out with respect could reveal improper instruction by someone else, which creates the need to have a discussion with that person.

Getting to the root of the problem is how we begin to make changes.  Help the person find the right answer to the problem, and making sure they completely understand what you expect, will prevent this from happening in the future.